Huff and Puff Post "Time for Brand New Site for Israel": Parallel History Aborigines and Palestinians

Huff and Puff Post reported a stunning agreement in Israeli-Palestinian relations. It has been reported that the parties agreed that it is time for a brand new site for Israel. The Israeli relocation will be voluntary, but it will also be a massive undertaking.

Proposed sites include Africa, the Outback of Australia, Fukushima once they clean it up, and Bangladesh.

Africa has miles of uninhabited land, and a good supply of African native population willing to rebuild the nation of Israel and then go home voluntarily as fabulously wealthy, but as unwanted (in Israel) black people.

The Outback of Australia, known for good steaks at a reasonable price, also has its share of black people, looking to enrich themselves in order to break into the Australian housing market at the top of the bubble. These black people are called Aborigines and are happy to work hard, and retire at the coast.

There were roughly as many Aborigines before the Aussie Invasion, as there were Palestinians in Palestine (750,000) at the time of the Plan Dalet, when they were forced out of Palestine. Many Palestinians were murdered, tortured and stoned, including children, by the atheistic Zionists who invaded.

At the time of the Invasion of Australia in 1788, there were over 750,000 Aborigines as well, in Australia. Instead of booting them out, the Aussies just killed many of them and gave the rest Smallpox, but they have bounced back.

Just as the Israelis tried to cover up the history of the Palestinians, so too, were documents shredded and destroyed in the Invasion of Australia. This behavior became the basis for Ollie North's destruction of documents in Iran-Contra, as well as Dick Cheney's destruction of documents at the end of his Royal Vice Presidential Term. It was a term worthy of caps.

I am just kidding about Ollie and Dick. 

Turns out, the Aborigines were considered by the invaders to be a non people, just like the Palestinians were. Even though they had an organized civilization, the invaders declared Australia owned by no one. That sounds all too familiar. I wonder if the Israelis learned from the Australians? After all, Israeli Prime Minister Golda Meir once said:

There were no such thing as Palestinians.

Anyway, the Israelis have promised not to capture the Aborigines and throw them into a Gaza-like open air prison/ghetto. They intend to pay a fair wage and that is crucial to quick reconstruction of Israel in Australia. The Aussies will welcome the Israelis since they will do almost anything to keep their house values up, and the Outback is useless to the Aussies. They want the Aborigines to become rich, and buy houses, as long as they don't have to pay them, themselves.

Fukushima is Fooked up, if you ask me. It isn't as dirty as Norfolk, pronounced Norfuk by southerners, the dirtiest sounding city in the world. Those southern people probably don't even pick up on the fuk part. But I digress.

The Israelis are deal makers.  There is bargain land in expensive Japan, near the meltdown. And since the Japanese don't want to live there, Fukushima is being seriously considered as a site. The Japanese excel in the technology to make it happen. And pictures from the recent war in Gaza show that the Israelis are good at moving buildings and dirt. That is an invaluable skill towards the goal of a perfectly clean site for the next Israel.

Bangladesh is likely a dark horse candidate for relocation. There are simply too many people to move,  although the population of Bangladesh would like to migrate to higher ground because of flooding, like to the north of Pakistan.

However, Israel supported the war of liberation and likely won't force the issue as it would require the Indians to leave their land in between West Pakistan and Bangladesh, once known as East Pakistan. We are talking about a gazillion people that have to be moved, and even if it were voluntary, it would be a task of almost impossible proportions.

And the Israelis probably just need to vacate middle Asia altogether, and not consider Bangladesh, so that the world can finally stop being inundated with news headlines with the word "Israel" included. 

This fictional article was inspired by a real article that appeared on a real website called The article was originally titled Time for a Brand New Site for Israel-Palestine peace talks. Well, one of the internet portals cut the last part off, labeling the article, Time for a Brand New Site for Israel. Of course moving the nation of Israel is a fantasy, but it would solve a lot of problems facing the world.

Disclaimer: This article contains satire and humor, and while loaded with truth in my opinion, it is up to the reader to verify the claims of the article, which are made in jest and are not necessarily proven fact. Some claims are fiction.


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