Ferguson Police Balk at Body Cams Because of Unwanted Transmissions of Erections and Body Fat

Ferguson police balk at the wide angled body cams recommended by the NFL for officers in St Louis County. The NFL wants this protection as it told the police union to take a hike regarding protests at a recent Ram's game.

Five players raised their hands in the "don't shoot me" pose and the union thought it had the power to push around the players and the First Amendment. In response, the NFL weighed in by seeking to impose wide angled cameras.

The Ferguson police, noted not just for bad race relations, but also for having sex with young women and eating donuts, were beside themselves in anger over the thought of having unwanted erections and stomach fat revealed by the film. Being the macho guys they think we believe they are, they are afraid their erections don't "measure up" if you catch our drift.

And why would they "measure up"? After all, sugar from donuts continually imbibed does have an effect on the male anatomy. There is nothing worse as image for a police force than limp erections going viral on Youtube. Indeed, some have called them below-the-belt selfies. You can't escape a wide angled camera.

Support from the white people in America has been strong. Yes, they like the police. But they like football, the NFL, and free speech even more! That came as a surprise to the St Louis County police department who thought they had the white folks totally brainwashed. Turns out that isn't the case.

As for viral erections, white people polled said they see enough underwear commercials on TV so they are numb to the erections, and besides, they are contained within the police uniform. That is an important and essential part of the wide angled package.

And the white people want to make sure their cops are in good physical condition. What better way is there than to monitor erections. Some people want continual monitoring, 24/7, but the police union was against it, saying that two hours in the morning and two hours at night are enough exposure.

The police union is contemplating putting some of their more studly officers into a calendar. That is making lemonade out of lemons, we tell you! Just keep the uniforms on, boys!

This ridicule was brought to you by folks disgusted by the St Louis County Police Association attack on the 1st Amendment. Who, the hell, do they think they are? They can chop themselves all off for all we care. We are just kidding about that and about the sex with young girls. But, people who hate the First Amendment are traitors or zombie-like. Something to think about.

Now that we know that Ferguson as a redevelopment project, urban renewal, and planned demolition, was established in 2012, two years before the riots in Ferguson, we can be rest assured that the burning buildings had help from Homeland Security. It was just too effective. I wonder if the Ferguson police will investigate those arsons! Lol. Are you kidding me? They probably were informed ahead of time. 

In all fairness, most police officers are conscientious, but ethical behavior is crucial to law enforcement because, like bankers, they are the referees. If, like the bankers, they cheat, it destroys the very fabric of society. Now that the New World Order is involved in false flags, hoaxes and burning things in riots, the police are becoming tools of this order.

Disclaimer: This article contains satire and humor, and while loaded with truth in my opinion, it is up to the reader to verify the claims of the article, which are made in jest and are not necessarily proven fact. Some claims are fiction. 


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